Jason Statham is the last of our action stars. He has the stoicism of Stallone, the dry wit of Arnold, and the action abilities of Van Damme, he stands alone at the top of the action hero mountain (to view Action Hero mountain in its aged entirety, pop in any of The Expendables franchise).

So, I was thrilled when I first saw the trailer for A Working Man, in theaters March 28. A film about Statham as a reluctant hero with a dangerous past who is forced to return to his ways when his adoptive family finds themselves in trouble? Sign me the heck up!

If that movie sounds familiar, it is because you have likely seen it in its many iterations (Taken, The Equalizer, Nobody, etc.). In fact, you may have even seen it with Statham as recently as last year in The Beekeeper.

Much like last year’s surprise Amazon Prime action hit The Beekeeper, A Working Man once again teams up Statham with director David Ayer (Fury, Suicide Squad). The script is based on the 2004 book Levon’s Trade by Chuck Dixon and was penned by Ayer and Sylvester Stallone.

No word on if Sly asked Chuck Dixon to take his name off his books and replace it with his own, as he famously did with Paula Gosling and A Running Duck, the book he based his Cobra script on.

The rights were first purchased by Balboa Productions with a television series in mind before being re-sold as a film, which makes a lot of sense when you take into account that A Working Man seems to have 3-4 movies going on simultaneously.

Yes, Levon (Statham) is going to go after the Garcias’ daughter Jenny, who has been captured to be sex trafficked. However, he will have to deal with several issues, including his own.

A daughter he is fighting for custody of, with a father-in-law who hates his guts (he blames Levon for his daughter’s suicide).

A meth-selling biker gang led by a former Navy SEAL that shares a mutual respect with Levon, who served at the same time in the SAS.

The Russian mob, crooked cops, drug dealing bartenders and gangs trying to extort his construction crew.

He does all this while navigating a longtime friendship with his blind war buddy Gunny, who, you guessed it, supplies him with guns and us with one-liners like. “We did some righteous shit, brother.” “I would talk you out of it. But what’s the point?”

In fact, the whole script seems to alternate between one-liners and exploratory dialogue like that.

Much like the Three-And-Key offense, Stallone and Ayer’s scripts prioritize three-point quips—“You a cop?” “You wish.”—with high-efficiency rim-running exposition. “It is Dimi. Wolo’s fuck-up kid. He runs drugs and girls outside of that bar.” Not a lot of room for mid-range dialogue in today’s action movie offense.

Maybe on their second pass, they got a note about nuance, as there seems to be instances in which they attempt to soften the bad guys including… THE SEX TRAFFICKERS?!

Before dropping Jenny off to presumably be raped and killed, one sex trafficker says, “Hey, kid. Look, we’re all just a number.” His partner adds, “Do you think we like doing this? We don’t. Our bank account does.”

Considering those are the kind of the lines being delivered for the entirety of the one hour 59 minutes. The acting is actually pretty spectacular. It seems as though everyone in the movie knows exactly which of the four films taking place at once they are in.

The set pieces and fight scenes are fist-pump-inducing, and the tropes comforting and familiar. A Working Man features fights at: a nightclub, a factory, a biker bar, a nightclub, a casino, a job site, a nightclub, a rundown apartment complex, a casino, a plantation, and a nightclub.

All the bad guys in the movie receive satisfactory comeuppance, whether it be by knife, gun, indoor pool, cathedral window, or grenade.

Even his father-in-law is almost burned alive before Statham shows up to save him. Covered in soot and blood, he looks up to Levon and offers a solitary “Thank you” and “Keep her safe,” referring to his granddaughter.

The film ends with Levon, his daughter, and Gunny sitting around the kitchen table, smiling, laughing, fade to black.

If that movie sounds awesome to you or sounds dumb to you, you are right.

I find myself about halfway through those two trains of thought, which is why I loved it. If you are unsure about whether or not you would enjoy it, I invite you to view your relationship with these types of movies through Charles Darwin’s Evolution of Man.

Australopithecus and Homo habilis will authentically enjoy this film and be moved by lines like, “Dad! It’s you. You came back!”

Next, you have Homo erectus—their bigger brains allow them to be critical of aspects of the film while still enjoying it, fist-pumping and nodding their heads with approval in their chair.

A one point Statham pulls two grenades on a bad guy’s tactical vest before delivering a flying kick to his chest that sends him backward into a sea of baddies. “Nice” I said aloud under my breath.

Then there is Homo neanderthalensis; they are capable of being critical of the movie and seeing the clichés and tropes well before they appear on screen and are amused by them. After Levon has his big showdown with former Marine and current meth dealer Dutch, the Homo neanderthalensis will likely chuckle when Statham closes his eyes and thanks him for his service. I snorted in my seat.

Finally, there is Homo sapiens. Homo sapiens might be split on A Working Man. They might find the tired story, senseless violence, and paint-by-numbers dialogue eye-roll-inducing.

Or they might be able to take stock of all these things and see the movie for what it is: a throwback action movie with a dependable star, full of mindless violence and clichés, that belongs on a big screen.

When I consider my relationship with A Working Man and other films of its ilk, I find myself somewhere between Homo erectus—poor posture, diminished intestinal abilities, fist-pumping throughout—and Homo neanderthalensis—carnivorous (snuck in beef jerky) and burst out laughing when the meth-dealing biker gang shows up to the final fight in bulk wearing Viking helmets and skull masks.

It is a shame that these movies rarely make it to the theater anymore because A Working Man checks all the boxes of a badass big-screen blast.

If you grew up on Arnold, Van Damme, and Stallone, I think you will enjoy this movie quite a lot. If you are capable of enjoying a silly “bad” movie, I think you will have fun getting to the theater for this one.

If you see these kinds of films as a stupid exercise in false machismo and a contributing factor to the diminished intellect of our country... how did you even find this blog? But, hey, more for us.

I am not sure Levon Cade will return, and I am not sure you will like this movie.

But, Statham will return. He will be playing the Levon Cade type. And, I will be returning to see it. And, spoilers, I am going to like it.