If Your Family Cared, They'd Never Endorse You
PHILADELPHIA (CB) — Over 15 members of the Kennedy family came forward to endorse President Joe Biden despite the campaign of family member Robert F. Kennedy Jr. Robert's sister even called Joe Biden her "hero" during the endorsement.
Robert F. Kennedy Jr. is running as a third-party candidate in this year's election, aiming to provide voters with a third choice in a presidential rematch that is lacking in excitement. Despite being a long shot, RFK has drawn interest and support with large crowds at campaign events.
Kennedy is an activist, author, and lawyer who has championed causes such as clean water and physical fitness. Although most of his base is likely drawn to him from his longtime outspoken position against any and all vaccines. With catchy slogans like: "HPV? Couldn't be me!" "Polio? Been gone a long time, yo!" "Measles and Mumps, have you considered gains and pumps?" "Tetanus? You ain't getting this!!" Kennedy's opposition to vaccines has made him very popular in the growing anti-vax communities of the last four years, and is also likely why his family has decided not to endorse him.
But ask yourself this: Would your family endorse you...for president?! I have two intelligent parents and a large loving family. I would be shocked and disappointed if they were to support me as the leader of the free world. It is a difficult job. No one who cares about you should want you to have to be president. Also, they have seen me quit so many things when they became difficult, from jigsaw puzzles to lacrosse. I am sure the second I was handed the nuclear football, I would be on the phone with them in tears, just like in 7th grade when handed the regular football.
Your family knows you, and they remember. They remember the collect call from 4th Avenue Detention Center in Phoenix. They recall why they had to get a new HP Pavilion 4450 for the family after your at-home-alone internet searches. Why their insurance premiums skyrocketed and their vehicles needed to be replaced. They remind you as a joke that 50-proof alcohol does not freeze, not even Bombay Gin that was on hand when you were a teen.
Mostly your family would not endorse you for president because they love you. Being commander-in-chief is like being that guy who had in-flight diarrhea halfway to Hawaii that made them turn the plane around. People hate you or feel bad for you, and you stink like shit.
Robert F. Kennedy Jr. was not endorsed by his family. But he summed that up well, saying on social media, "We might be divided in our opinions, but we are united in our love for each other. Anyways, my sister is a huge bitch." So while the Kennedy family is choosing not to endorse RFK, they are not taking it too personally because their family knows them and loves them…probably.
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