Halfway through the month of May, my morning walk is severely hindered. Not by the inconsistent and rising temperature throughout the walk that causes me to shed my sweatshirt mid-walk, revealing my not-ready-for-t-shirt-weather torso. While this is certainly an embarrassing inconvenience, I am fortunate enough not to be the biggest eyesore. No, that would be the wildly popular practice that was started by Plantlife in 2019. #NoMowMay.

Plantlife is a citizen scientist group that manages 24 nature reserves around the United Kingdom. The guiding principle is: more grass, more good. And if that sounds like simplistic caveman speak, let me explain No Mow May's guiding principle. The thought is that by completely neglecting your lawn, you are supporting pollinators, native plants, and wildlife diversity.

But the selling point for folks who are opting out of lawn care to start the season is bees. People love them! And while the decrease in bee populations is greatly exaggerated, studies have shown a decline in the 21st century. Israel Del Toro, a biology professor at Appleton's Lawrence University, notes that there are many contributing factors to the decline of bees and insects, citing climate change, the increased use of herbicides and pesticides, however, the most controllable stressor is habitat loss.

Which leads us to why your clean-cut, respectable neighbor now has a lawn that resembles the bush of Tom Hanks in Cast Away. While normally these residential monstrosities are littered with broken-down old Mobiles, instead, you can print a sign to let the world know you are being intentionally lazy this month and are not a deadbeat but, in fact, a brave and strong protector of the bees.

But are you?

The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was to convince the world that No Mow May was beneficial for the environment. Which is a reference to the famed "Usual Suspects" quote and not me calling citizen scientists the devil. In fact, I am a huge fan of "citizen scientists." What a come-up as a citizen to give yourself a profession you do not qualify for. In fact, I am officially opting into the title myself. I am also a citizen doctor, firefighter, and lawyer. I am equally qualified as the inventors of No Mow May now to perform any and all of those professions' duties.

Before debunking No Mow May in principle, let me give you your flowers if you partake. But, like real ones too, not the overgrown junk that is nestled up against your virtue-signaling sign declaring how brave you are for neglecting lawn care. The idea could work, and I am certain your heart is in the right place, even if your mower is still in storage. No Mow May has a guiding principle that we should create a healthy environment for pollinators. The name is really the problem, as it creates a feel-good trend and not a sensible solution. According to Tamson Yeh, a turf specialist at Cornell, letting grass grow high and then suddenly mowing it is actually very counterproductive. Bees communicate about where food is, and when they discover an unmowed lawn, they remember to come back to it. After Memorial Day, the food source they rely on is depleted. Hibernating insects have memories that span year to year and not day to day, so establishing permanent food sources like early blooming trees, plants, and shrubs is more beneficial than a temporary food source. Furthermore, when June 1st hits, cutting back grass from five inches plus to more than one-third its height can cause the grass to go into shock. It also creates a spectacular killing field for predators whose victims have been afforded a month of protection and false security.

No Mow May should Go Go Away. I understand the slogan is fire, and the appeal of not caring for your lawn to start the season is unmatched. I can also understand how it might make you feel like a regular old rainbow warrior. But when you consider its objective, it is not the sum of its parts. If you have the desire to protect pollinators, consider leaving a section of your lawn unkempt, planting sections of natural flowers, keeping your lawn at three inches, and not using pesticides. And if you love being part of something and a catchy slogan, you can join up with the "Leave the Leaves" movement, as it creates a safe haven for pollinators to lay their eggs and hibernate. But for the sake of your neighbors, my morning walks, and even the bees... MOW YOUR GODDAMN LAWN.

Associated Press. (2022, April 24). Gardening: No Mow May? https://apnews.com/article/gardening-no-mow-may-lawns-6aa1669b9e9bb5b5d8ea671c44d186f2

Associated Press. (2023, May 9). No Mow May aims to help boost declining bee population. https://apnews.com/article/wisconsin-insects-la-crosse-appleton-bees-a0a421e716355530f0f75fb1d0a66eee

Wikipedia contributors. (2023, April 23). Organic lawn management. In Wikipedia, The Free Encyclopedia. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Organic_lawn_management#No_Mow_May